How Much of God Do I Have?
I only get as much of God as I want.
When I consider the experiences of myself and others, I must acknowledge that free-will is both a blessing and a curse in my relationship with God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.
A blessing because without free-will I can never know His pure, unconditional love for me. Unless I am free to reject Him, I can never be genuinely loved by Him.
A curse because my experience of Him is not a question of how much He wants to actively participate in my life, but, rather, how much I am willing to allow Him to do so. Only the fool in me does not want His presence to permeate all of my existence. And too often I heed that fool’s inclinations.
Father conveys the nature or our interactions in the Book of Jeremiah this way:
“Then you will call upon Me, and you will go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. And you will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart. I will be found by you, says the Lord.” Jeremiah 29:11-14
The Psalmist models for me an excellent response:
“As the deer pants for the water brooks, so pants my soul for You, O God.” Psalm 42:1
Make no mistake, the onus of relationship is now on my side. He has stated His case plainly—He so loves me and this world that He gave Himself for me and to me.
God is infinite, there is always more. Ever the gentleman, God does not force Himself upon me. Yes, He does hold me accountable for my choices (what good Father doesn’t), but they are my choices, not His.
I will only get as much of God as I want.
So, I routinely ask myself, “How much of God do I want, to what lengths am I going to go to get it?”
And C.S. Lewis councils me:
“If we let ourselves, we shall always be waiting for some distraction or other to end before we can really get down to our work. The only people who achieve much are those who want knowledge so badly that they seek it while the conditions are still unfavorable. Favorable conditions may never come.” Learning in Wartime
Wonderfully, there is always more of Him.
